Unwoken night. 

So I open my eyes, and have a sweet talk with my partner. Warmth in his tone, peaceful voice, assuring volume, and affective words. I take it all in, think, but then I switch of my thinking. I guess it is the night of my birthday, and for some reason I am counting the birthday wishes I recieve. I think it’s a funny thing that when I recieve these wishes, I feel no joy. Maybe it is to do with the fact that why would someone remember you a date that marks the day you were born, and not remember you on an average day? Why should you matter for a day and not hold any significance the other. Sometbing else is bothering I think. Hmm. I’m still writing trying to see if writing will articulate what I am feeling. Maybe it will help, maybe there is nothing I am feeling. I am feeling that there is a feeling but I feel to tell myself I feel nothing. 
Maybe better that way. Let me continue my unwoken ( if that’s a word) night. Happy birthday to me( wow I’m so important-in sarcastic voice) 

Round and Around

Oh my beloved, 

You have seized to escape from my presence.


My eyes do search you,

As time’s pulse beats, 

Moment by moment. 

My pupils dance around, 


Round and around,

Magnifying the scent you left with.


My gaze stands still,

Grasping where you had touched.


Why beloved? 

Why have you escaped my sight, 

I am eternally in recognition of your warmth, your sweetness, your breath and your touch.


Whilst you have also escaped, 

Yet you dance in circulation,

Round and around in my heart


Your movement inside me, has

Kept my pulse bearing

And my eyes searching.


My scent in recognition of your sweet perfume. 


My touch in encounter with your feel.


And my breath for the move you make inside me,


Round and around.

Just my luck

Just my luck

Her fine soul was there,
Watching with her eyes of heaven,
Breathing in the scent of her perfume,
This is,
Just my luck.

I allowed my gaze to grasp her presence,
Imagining my hands behind her spine,
Making her shiver,
Like a naked figure in the arctic,
Hair reaching out to the air,
Like a beggar reaching for gold.
This was beginning to be,
Just my luck.

The Gods of heaven,
Were depriving the desirable joys of this earth,
Just my luck.

She was all mine,
Her golden syrup curly hair was mine to feel,
Her lips of life were to whisper thee time of death,
Whilst her fluttering laughter were to remind me,
This was,
Just my luck.

Questioning God


Close your eyes. And think; just think what your purpose in this world is. What are you here for and what is the truth. And if so there is a truth, how do you seek it. Or let me just sit back and let allow it to seek me. How are you to know such truths exist? Afteall, all religions and faiths in the world are myths are so to be altered sources passed down so mankind is to follow. Better yet, this contributes to the decline of religion whereby people deny world religions and just turn to theory of science.

I hereby, do not judge one to be a believer or a disbeliever in God. What you seek is seeking you, but why sit back and waste such beloved time. There is an entire universe out there, full of beauty, art, culture and each and one has a purpose for it. Seek its purpose then possess the wisdom of the truth. Everything has its creator, if a chair has a man to create it. Who does man have to create it? We cannot yet answer this, thus accept mankind’s knowledge is yet restricted. We have not all perceived every aspect of life, for example death.

If you were to know that there was a possible truth to the afterlife or even if there was an afterlife wouldn’t you want to know? I mean we have plenty of time in this life but why waste precious chances of risking our opportunity of the afterlife.

Boredom I may be causing here for you readers if you’re reading this, but my main discussion here is all over the place because there is so much truth you can posses about this life. And I preferably know it’s hard to believe such religions, but I come bearing truth. Not the truth you hear in the news or the truth you hear from the uneducated but the truth In my heart which I cling onto. Jesus you may call him, Prama, or God. But I call him my creator, my lord who is unique in his oneness.


Seek the truth of your heart, for it is he you will return to. And better late than never readers.

We call it love. Or so should I say my definition of the curse

I closed my eyes. Closed them tight. Darkness. Fear. Death. Trust. Love. Mercy. Compassion. Each one circulating my mind. For how long was I to continue till this curse had escaped willingly from my soul. This was a curse. Love you called it. Happiness was it you titled it. Joy, compassion, strength.. Such feelings you brought with it. What was I to do with such love? When my happiness was for not long but felt eternal. When my strength was the reasoning to my weakness.


And my lover the air to my breath. 

I close them shut

Breathe it in

Let it out.


I wander around

Let my mind go free of your thought

Pause the memory

Then let it out.


I display my beauty to my world

Allowing it to be seen with thee naked eyes.

Hide this beloved possession

Then question is my beauty to be beautiful when seen?


I open my heart,

Its open.

Yet, it doesnt want to released.


I swear by the divine, I have not yet opened it.

And yet.

Gods treasure from heaven has blinded thee eyes,

Your essence has conquered my soul,

Making my memory surrender to you.


And your beauty has feared me the burning hell, yet

The taste of paradise you welcome me with,

Commands me to kiss the floor you walk on.


… And the heart shall

The eyes open, it lets you see

The doors open, it lets you enter
The mind opens, it lets you think
The lips open, it lets you feel
The heart opens, it lets you love.
The eyes close, you don’t have to see
The doors close, you don’t have to enter
The mind closes, you don’t have to think
The lips close, you can end the touch,
The heart, my beloved, has no choice.
As the eyes open again, you will still be before me
As the doors reopen, you will still be knocking
As the mind opens, my thoughts have surrendered to you,
As my lips reopen, the taste of your touch carry’s me dancing to my grave.
My love,
will conquer my soul,
for my soul is the only thing I will carry in the hereafter.Image